Final Move

It hasn't even been 2 months since I moved to Blogspot but I'm switching to a different blogging software again. I thought Blogspot would be enough but it's not as flexible as I originally thought.

The new blog URL:
Wayward Now Home @ Wordpress

Hopefully I'll see you all there! If anyone has this blog bookmarked or subscribed, please update your bookmarks and feeds! Thanks.

Still Green Leaves... For Now

God has blessed me beyond description with Charles Leiter's book, Justification and Regeneration. I've read a chapter (sometimes less) every weeknight since I got it in the mail a week ago and it has blessed me in ways that I didn't think possible.

I've been struggling greatly with sin and it has caused lots of doubt in my life. Paul writes in his second epistle to the Corinthians that if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old things have passed, the new things have come. I hear this so often that I started asking myself, "If you really are a new creature, why are you still committing these horrible acts of sin?" I began doubting my regeneration and salvation, which is a very dangerous thing to do. Doing that will only lead you to wallow in sorrow and despair, which distracts you from looking towards Christ and glorifying Him with your life.

I just read a chapter in Justification and Regeneration that dealt with these issues I have and it brought a smile to my face and joy to my heart.

Beloved Christian, sin's days are numbered in your life! The ax has already been laid to the root of your sin. Like a tree that has been cut off at ground level, its leaves may still appear green for a while, but the fact is that its life is over. It is only a matter of time until every leaf withers and falls to the ground!

Charles Leiter, Justification and Regeneration

These sins that I struggle with are just remnants of my old self. Though my flesh will still sin, it is not a representation of who I really am in Christ. Sin will attempt to reign over my body but if I walk with the Spirit, sin has no power over me. If you're reading this and struggle with the same problems, I pray that God would enlighten you with the truth and bring peace to your soul. Seek His face and walk in His ways and His grace will shine upon you!

Video Recording & Covers

Today was filled with the same, old activities and routines. However, there was one new thing that I did today: I recorded myself covering a couple worship songs with my sister's digital camera and I uploaded them to my YouTube account. As of now, I've covered Aaron Shust's My Savior, My God and Matt Redman's and Chris Tomlin's Wonderful Maker. Check them out if you want!

I think I'll cover a lot more songs throughout the rest of the summer. Maybe I'll even play a few of my original songs (none of which are complete) and put them up as well!

It was actually fun to see myself playing the guitar. There's just something about hearing and seeing myself on video that makes me laugh and feel slightly embarrassed. I'll keep recording videos of myself, though! Maybe someone will be blessed by one. Praise God!

A Blessing and a Curse

On Saturday, my youth group and I celebrated the birthday of one of our kids. We had a great time of fellowship and we spent the majority of the day in a park for a picnic with activities. For the first time in over 6 months, I got to play tennis!

Having come home from college, I can't help but be locked up in my room all day. There's really nothing for me to do around here. I live in the suburbs so anything that is remotely interesting is not within walking distance. I don't have a car. My college friends don't live near me. My youth group is still in school for another month. I'm left with nothing to do but whatever is available on my computer.

[Jesus said,] "I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned. If you abide in Me and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples."

John 15:5-8

Based on how the past week or so went, this is both a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, I have a lot of time on my hands to spend in the Word, read Christian literature, play my guitar and practice my songwriting. On the other hand, the internet can be a source of procrastination, distraction and temptation. The logical thing to do would be to limit my internet time, and although that would help me immensely, it would also require a lot of discipline, which is something that I lack greatly in the midst of summer and boredom.

So there's really nothing left for me except to pray for strength and grace to keep my priorities in order, to keep my focus where it should be, to make myself smaller and to make God's glory everything. I want to be fruitful. I want to abide in Christ. I want to prove myself a faithful disciple of our Lord, bringing glory unto Him and Him alone.

Justification and Regeneration

I haven't updated much lately because I don't know what to write. Ever since I came home for the summer, there hasn't been much to talk about. I suppose I'll start talking about what I read in the Word for the next few days.

Something that I haven't mentioned before is the kindness of the Leiter family. I'm talking about Charles Leiter, author of Justification and Regeneration, and his wife, Mona. A few weeks ago, I had a random urge to check the inbox of an e-mail account that I had never used. Lo and behold, sitting in my otherwise empty inbox was an e-mail from Mr. Leiter!

We had a short discussion over the next few days and I asked him for some recommended Christian reading and he was kind enough to give me a huge list of books. I don't know if I'll ever finish reading all of the books on the list but I'll definitely try!

The reason I'm writing this is that the Leiters offered to send me a free copy of their book as a gift. As a poor college student who doesn't have many book resources for theology, I happily and joyfully accepted the offer. Since last weekend, I've been the excited owner of their book and I am learning a great deal from it.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. Now, all these things are from God...

2 Corinthians 5:17-18

Mr. Leiter explains the intricacies of the doctrines of justification and regeneration in such a way that anyone could understand. Although I'm only halfway through the book (just started the section on the doctrine of regeneration), I've already learned a great deal about these doctrines. I've heard many sermons that dealt with these issues and they taught me a lot but this book is precious to me for its content.

I highly, highly recommend this book for any and every Christian out there walking with the Lord.

If either of you happen to read this, thank you so much, Mr. Charles and Mona Leiter.

Our Daily Bread

I haven't posted much lately because I've been busy. My finals went well, as far as I know, and I'm relieved to be finished for the semester. I packed up and handed in my dormitory key and I moved back into my house for the summer. I spent the weekend relaxing and catching up with my youth group kids, so it has been a great few days.

What I've come to realize is just how damaging or encouraging an environment could be. I didn't really notice it while I was at college but the college environment, even though I try my best to avoid parties and ungodly activities, really has a creeping influence on the life of a believer. I read the Word less when I was there; I spent less time with my Father there; I started enjoying the things of the world more, such as video games and television shows and movies.

Now that I'm home, I've actually read my Bible a few times. I've actually talked with others believers and had genuine fellowship, talking about the things of Christ and the life of a Christian. Just the change in environment has had a positive influence on me.

God has opened my eyes and helped me to see the tremendous importance of Christ and His Word, our daily Bread. How can we profess to be spiritually alive if we do not eat the Bread of Life every day? Without it, we will starve. I pray that the Holy Spirit would guide me, and anyone who reads this, into spending time in the Word daily so that we would not starve.

Insomnia Leading to Lyrics

I've had final exams all week, which is the reason why I haven't been doing daily updates. Today is my last final exam and I'll be packing up and leaving for home for the summer!

I was laying awake in my bed last night at 2 in the morning. I couldn't sleep and all I did was stir around in my bed, so I did what came to my mind naturally: ponder. I thought about God and His greatness and various lyrics began popping into my mind. In retrospect, I was thinking of lyrics because I wanted to write a song, but I was also saying a prayer of sorts to Him. A prayer of praise, awe and wonder.

It turns out that the lyrics are more poetry than song but that's a fine line, isn't it? I can always add a melody later and revise the lyrics if they need revising.

You gave foundations to the earth
And set all things in motion,
From the swaying of the treetop leaves
To the roaring of the oceans.

And the beauty of the things You've made
Have filled me with such wonder
Of why You would come down and die
To heal a bond we sundered.

You revealed Your glorious plan to man
When You hung on that cross.
Now everything that I once sought,
I count it all as loss.

And I'm giving up my sinful ways
To search and seek Your face,
To glorify Your holy name
Because I stand in grace.

The Beauty of God's Creation

This is going to be a short post since it's a spur-of-the-moment one; I just had to write about it because it's a rare experience for me.

I was procrastinating studying for my final exams tomorrow by browsing YouTube for guitar-related videos. I happened upon an acoustic fingerpicker named Staffan Svahn and I listened to his song, "Red Hills". As I listened, I read the description for the video:

Yesterday evening I took off late for my daily run. When I ran up into our valley the sun was setting behind me. As I gazed up towards the hills they caught fire. For about a minute the hills glowed in the most spectacular shades of red.

And as I read this description, the image that he witnessed burned into my mind. Rolling hills that glowed a fiery red against the backdrop of a marvelous, setting sun. Immediately, the thought pops into my head: "How great is the Lord?"

For possibly the first time in my life, I actually sat in awe and wonder at the magnitude of the God of Scripture and how beautiful His creation is. This was an exciting moment for me because I can't recall myself ever being in true awe of the Lord even though I know with my mind that He is beyond comprehension.

Oh, how great is our God? Praise Him forever and ever.

Paul Washer's Thoughts on Repentance

Paul Washer. This man has had such an impact in my walk with Christ, I dare say that I almost idolize him. I was converted through a YouTube video of him preaching and God has used many of his sermons to open my eyes to truth. I listened to another one of his sermons and it was exactly what I needed to hear in my struggle with sin and repentance.

I have so many people come up to me and they doubt the assurance of their salvation because in their scrutiny of their own repentance, they're expecting, almost demanding, that their saving repentance be the repentance of a mature believer of 30 years. They scrutinize every aspect of their life and if they don't look like a Puritan, then they say, "I cannot be converted."

What you need to understand is that repentance, in its initial seed, is simply a changing of the mind. "God is all I need. I need Him!" You say, "That's it?" It can be. "I can't save myself. I'm lost! I need a Savior."

You say, "But the Bible describes repentance in so many different ways!" Yes, it does. But are you expecting a full-blown repentance the second God begins working in your heart?

As I study repentance in Scripture, I look back at the moment I was converted and my repentance was a very singular thing: "I need to be saved!" But now after 25 years, as I grow in Scripture, my repentance matures and deepens. But you err, young person, when you scrutinize your life and you wonder whether not you're saved and you're looking for a repentance that can only be found in someone who's walked with God for decades.

- Paul Washer

As I've said in my previous blog posts, I am struggling a great deal with certain sins in my life right now. I hear so much that repentance is a turning away from sin and a turning towards God and His ways. Is that true? Absolutely. But repentance, like sanctification, is a process. This is something I've forgotten.

I keep reprimanding myself and I keep wrestling over the fact that I'm either not repenting enough or that my repentance is possibly false. Why do I think such things? Because I wrongly expect myself to completely abandon my sins as soon as I repent. I have the incorrect notion that I need to overcome these sins now or else my repentance is weak or inadequate.

That's not true. I was wrong. Should we strive for perfection? Yes, because our chief goal is to conform to the image of Jesus Christ, who is nothing short of perfection. But at the same time, it's a process. Repent when you sin but remember that sanctification is a process of growth and only God can determine how fast that growth is.

Christianity and Jobs

I've come to realize that the shower is possibly the best location for deep, meditative thoughts. Unless I'm in a rush, I find myself pondering deep thoughts whenever I'm standing beneath the warm streams of water and scrubbing myself clean. Sometimes I'll be thinking about possibly melodies for new songs, or I might be reviewing the message of the latest sermon I heard, or I might be thinking about events in my life.

For those that don't know, I'm a 19-year-old student that attends a small college in Northern New Jersey that focuses on science and engineering. I enrolled in this school before I was saved, which occurred in the summer of 2007. My major is Computer Science with a concentration in Video Game Design.

While I was in the shower the other day, a thought crossed my mind. Should a Christian have a secular job? I understand that there are many people out there who are truly saved and hold secular jobs. But as Christians, our chief goal is to be conformed to the image of Jesus Christ and to glorify God in all we do.

My question is this: is it acceptable for me to pursue a career as a video game programmer? Programming software is a very time-consuming activity. Isn't that time better spent studying the Word, praying, doing long-term missions, attending seminary, writing songs for His glory, etc? My main concern is that my time spent programming is wasted time that does not bring glory to God.

Can a Christian hold a secular job and bring glory to God? If so, couldn't a Christian bring more glory to God through other things?